Monday 20 May 2019

Self Care - A Necessary Indulgence




Last year I celebrated a big birthday….. I turned the big 4 0 ! Two of my oldest friends whom I have known since I was 12, also celebrated their 40th. For a long time in the lead up to this event we all discussed various ways we could celebrate this milestone together. We all have children and lead busy working lives so we decided what better way to celebrate than to go on a week long trip together sans husbands / children. Thus began a long and exciting search for an appropriate destination that would have the right amount of R and R, be affordable and yet not too far away as one of us was in New Zealand, another in Sydney and me in Melbourne. 

We ended up booking close to a year in advance but finally settled on a womens’ only retreat in Caangu called Escape Haven which recently was voted the best wellness retreat in the world at the ‘World Luxury Hotel’ awards. We impatiently awaited the much anticipated holiday, even starting a WhatsApp group called Bali countdown, and finally last week the big day arrived! We were certainly not disappointed, and we have just returned from one of the most nurturing and nourishing experiences that we could have ever imagined. 

I thought I’d write two separate posts on my Escape Haven experience, this first one on the practicalities of the actual retreat and the next one on some of the self care aims I have taken away from the experience.

Escape Haven is the brain child of New Zealander Janine Hall. Her concept was beautiful . She wanted to create a place where women could ‘step outside their busy lives, put down the labels, the roles, the masks, the multi-tasking that as women, we are so good at doing . And just be.

Escape Haven in Canggu is located in a hip, surfer and yogi beach town of Echo Beach …. A bit like a Balinese Byron Bay. It’s quite a diachotomy to see the tranquil rice fields laced with hippy yoga shops and then vegan/vegetarian specialty restaurants.






When we stepped into the retreat and were greeted by our retreat leaders, they made it clear that this was meant to be a week where the emphasis was on self care. We were instructed to feel no guilt if we didn’t want to attend any activity, equally we were encouraged to try as many things as we felt comfortable doing. We each had a meeting with our retreat leader to discuss our aims for the week, what we hoped to get out of the retreat and most importantly to make sure we booked in all our spa treatments. They went to great lengths to ensure we were happy with the weeks timetable. With a maximum of 14 guests per retreat and over 40 staff, they are really able to individualise everyone’s week and ensure a guest satisfaction in a way that is impossible to do at larger resorts.




EH have 4 main packages that you can choose from, a surf/yoga program, a yoga program, a fitness program and an aruveyda healing treatment program. All programs are very flexible and can be tailored to your needs and include unlimited spa treatments (YES I SAID UNLIMITED SPA TREATMENTS!!!)  and also a daily yoga session. When I told my friends I was keen to do the surf package they laughed at me. For a start none of us had ever surfed in our lives, secondly I was/am the most unfit of the three of us and this would definitely not be a ‘relaxing’ endeavour. I was convinced however, that this was the year for us to try. If we didn’t give it a go now then we would never do it. We also reasoned that if we really didn’t like it we could just swap to the yoga program. 


The main retreat in Canguu offers 5 one bedroom villas, a two bed room pool villa, a 3 bed room pool villa, and another 3 bed room pool villa which is about a 10 min walk away from the main retreat. We stayed at this slightly off site villa which was beautiful. 

We arrived a day before the start of the retreat and were able to stay an extra night on a bnb basis. Some of the guests from the previous week's retreat were still leaving when we arrived but we were greeted by the ever smiling face of one of the lovely retreat staff Kadek. We were presented with a cool welcome drink and a beautiful frangipani necklace. Kadek drove us down to our villa in a buggy and showed each of us to our rooms. He, and all the staff for that matter make such a point of knowing every guest’s name, you feel at home straight away and it really is amazing how they do it week after week. Kadek knew we would be tired after our journeys and promptly brought us some takeaway menus and arranged for our dinners to be delivered to the villa.



Each bedroom was beautifully appointed and we each had an outdoor shower/bath and toilet. I personally am not so taken by the whole outdoor bathroom concept …… the thought of mosquitos coming to bite me while I was on the toilet..not so pleasant 😂….. but I’ll agree it does look stunning.


In our villa we had our own living room, kitchen (not that we used this at all) and pool which was also really lovely. We each received our own compendiums with information about what to expect at the retreat, our individual timetables with spa treatment times and a list of all the different treatments on offer. There was also information about the local area and we soon realised that there were also many local shops to explore and wondered where we would fit in time to do this.

Since we were doing the surf program we had an early start every day, beginning with an amazing breakfast served at 6.30am before we left at 7am. We were served fresh mango or banana pancakes together with a fruit smoothie bowl to ensure we had plenty of energy for our adventure. Having never surfed before I was somewhat nervous about my ability to get through the week. Although it was something I wanted to do, I carried a heavy load of self doubt and angst to the first lesson. One of my aims of the trip had been to do something outside comfort zone and this was certainly one of those things. 

On the first day our wonderfully supportive and patient instructors explained to us the basic concept of how we would be able to get up on a board. We were given quite big long boards that made the whole process easier, but having said that it was still a process to work out how I would get from a lying down position to ‘popping’ up into standing. By shear luck I managed to get up standing in a rather frumpy fashion on day 1, but to be honest I hadn’t really grappled with where my body should be in space at any given time. My instructors kept telling me to 'relax , relax, relax,' so I’d lie on my board, take big deep yogic breaths and try and just be. All of a sudden, whilst I was trying to find this ‘zen’ they’d  push me out on a wave and start yelling ‘Go go go go go!’. In a fit of panic I would suddenly forget anything I had been told and hurtle myself up into an upright position. Needless to say I kept ending up off my board and into the water! 

                         


 By the 2nd day, I had begun to panic and midway through the lesson my negative self started to talk to me. 'I wasn’t having fun. What was I doing? Everyone else was managing it but I was not. The best thing to do would be to quit and stop this nonsense.' I’m ashamed to admit I did have a moment where I nearly cried. I didn’t like to feel like I had failed but equally I felt like I was meant to be on holidays so why be miserable?. I kept trying to remember why I had wanted to do it in the first place..…. I wanted to push myself to attempt something outside my comfort zone. I started to just try and enjoy being out there on the water. Putu, one of the instructors came up to me and said ‘Just breathe and have fun.’ Somehow it triggered a more positive thought process and I decided to try and slow down and just do what I could do. I started to move much more slowly and suddenly I realised you didn’t have to jump up with one quick move. Before I knew it, I was consistently standing and starting to catch some waves! This was one of those moments that highlighted again to me the power of our own mind games. In the end all three of us managed to surf.


                                                         

    



The rest of the week’s surfing lessons were much more fun because somehow I had overcome that mental barrier of ‘I can’t’ to ‘I’ll just have fun and do what I can do’. I stopped putting pressure on myself to ‘achieve’ and just tried to enjoy every moment for what it was. 
On the third day we were taken out by boat to a place called Sanur, where we did reef surfing which was pretty special. The current was really strong and I spent most of my energy trying not to go backwards.
Noah 

Thankfully, one of our instructors Noah, (who I think looks like what I would imagine a caucasian Jesus to look like) came to my rescue several times and hauled me back out to sea. The shift division team (the surfing instructors) were such genuinely lovely and patient people who believed in all of us and encouraged us endlessly. They really made the experience incredible. Each day after our surfing we were treated to a fresh coconut drink and some snacks prepared by the retreat whilst we sat on the beach and just took everything in.








 On the drive back, Noah would pull out a laptop and show us all the photos taken by Janu, the incredible photographer who sat ashore each morning with his massive long lens taking photos of all of us. He would give us suggestions on how we could do things better and it really was great to be able to see our improvement over the 5 days. At the end of the week we were even given a USB with all these photos so we had proof to show our loved ones!

Each day we would arrive back to retreat in time for a beautiful freshly prepared healthy and delicious lunch. We’d share stories with the other guests who were doing other programs about their morning and it was genuinely a lovely and relaxing atmosphere. 




One of the highlights of the retreat is the unlimited spa treatments. We were each allocated a 90 min time slot per day where we could choose to have whatever treatment we desired. They ranged from Balinese massages to reflexology to facials to body treatments. You could add more treatments if your timetable allowed and the therapists were all excellent. One of my favourite treatments was the crème bath where you head/hair/shoulders/neck was continually massaged using a thick moisturising crème, it felt so nurturing and calming. My only regret was that there was not enough time for more!

The food on the retreat was wholesome, fresh and healthy, yet extremely tasty. You never felt hungry and it was a reminder again about how to achieve a sustainable healthy eating lifestyle. Each meal we were treated to something different and the variety was exceptional. My sugar and processed food intake was nearly negligent during the week and I could certainly feel the benefits of that. At the end of the week we were all emailed the recipes for us to try at home. As my friends and I were celebrating a birthday the staff even made a beautiful almond chocolate cake for the group to share which was so thoughtful and much appreciated.


                


Another highlight of the week was the so called ‘Indulge and Ignite’ day. This was a day in the middle of the week where you could choose a special outing/activity. The choices included a Thai cooking class / silver jewellery making /eco cycling tour in Ubud or a day at a beach club in Uluwatu . This day gives you the opportunity to do something a little bit different and explore a bit more of Bali. My friends chose the eco cycling tour and described it as a gentle downhill ride taking in some of Bali’s most beautiful sites. I chose to do the silver jewellery class and had a wonderful and creative time designing and then making two rings – a silver one for my husband and a brass ring with a citrine stone for myself. The class was a lot of fun and a little break from the physical activity of surfing.
Melting down silver
My Citrine Brass Ring


Eco Cycling Tour Ubud


This week away was certainly much more than just a holiday. All of us have families and a busy work life. This time away from our home lives felt like an extravagance especially when we were planning the logistics, but we were all fortunate enough to have supportive partners/families to make it possible. We have now all returned home refreshed, renewed and invigorated. We talked, laughed, cried and more importantly regained our sense of self. The experience has also made me re-evaluate the importance of self care and explore ways I can make sustainable changes to my everyday life that can support this, and I am truly grateful and thankful that I was able to do this with two of my dearest friends! 

Closing Ceremony